The Werewolf King's Bride

(From Blue's Perspective)

Away from the chaos, I was doing some work in the garden. The place was set up very well. Abel was guarding me as Dem ordered. I had asked Dem why he had sent Abel. His reply was that he was worried about me.

Perita still had not come back from the magic tower. Or perhaps she was back, but I did not get the news.

"Your Highness, may I ask what happened to your eyes?" Abel asked.

It looked like he intended to ask about it for a long time, but could not find the right time or way to ask.

"Uh…"

"It's alright if Your Highness does not want to answer. My apologies for asking such a question," he said.n/ô/vel/b//jn dot c//om

"I cried," I said.

"Cried?"

I gave a nod. "I was not feeling well. So, I cried. I just… have never been alone like this after coming to this world. Of course, there are people around me. But… when Dem is not here, it feels very lonely.

My room feels very lonely and empty. Last year, Ruby was with me the whole time, so I felt less lonely. But this time, it's not the same. I am letting my emotions take over me. I am trying to get stronger emotionally. Sometimes it's really hard.

But I am trying. So, from now on, if you see my eyes puffy, know that there is no new reason for it. Just the same. I wish no one has to see this again. Crying doesn't suit a Queen."

"Can I say something, Your Highness?"

"Go ahead."

"I think I have to disagree with Your Highness. I don't think there is any saying that crying does not suit a Queen. Crying does not make a Queen weaker."

"You are saying I should not listen to others?"

"That is right, Your Highness."

"Then why do you do it?"

"Pardon me?"

"Why do you listen to others and eat less because they told you that you eat like a dragon?"

He did not reply, just stared at me with a perplexed look in his eyes.

"It's true, is it not?"

"It is, Your Highness."

"You don't lie. I like that part."

"I won't dare lie to Your Highness," he said. "But may I ask where have you heard about it?"

"I cannot reveal their name. Someone told me. They are worried about you. They don't want me to reveal their name," I said.

"I see."

"A lot of people can say a lot of things, Abel. But I personally don't think listening to every single one of them is a good idea. Some people will say nonsense. But we cannot trust that and do according to what they say and harm ourselves."

"I know what I am doing is not the right thing for my body. And I am a knight. So, eating properly is important for me. But listening to the same thing, again and again, caused me to change my eating habit. Now, even if I want to, I cannot just return to my normal eating habit," he said, without showing any expression on his face. "But I am trying."

I could not talk about the situation much longer. It was not because Abel did not want to talk about it. He said the truth no matter what I asked. The most unsettling fact was his emotionless face as he told me about his eating disorder and how people used to mock him for eating too much. I could not bear it. I felt pain.

It was like I could feel the pain that he did not show on his face or voice.

I had heard about it from his fellow knight. I heard from Calix that Knight Lucinda started training at the same year as Abel did and she was one of the few people who knew Abel quite well. So, I called her. She was more than happy to help and told me about his eating disorder that had started two years ago.

Abel apparently took a potion to keep his body fit even though it was a very dangerous thing for his health. He stopped eating enough, so he would take the potion which would not make him weak. But it secretly sure was running his health.

I mentioned the drug and he admitted to taking it. I told him not to take it anymore. He promised to listen to me. I knew he would. If he did not eat and did not take the potion as well, he would grow weaker. But he would still listen to me.

He was a very loyal knight who would even die if Dem or I told him to. I did not want him to do that though.

I would send the palace doctor to him. He would tell Abel what to do.

I met Perita again at noon. She came to apologize. I was sure she did not know about it beforehand. It turned out Luc lectured her a lot for a long time.

"What is the problem?" Doctor Dimitri asked.

I had summoned him tonight because I was afraid I would not be able to sleep.

"I cannot sleep," I said.

"At all?"

"I do fall asleep in the end. But that's after a long time," I explained.

"I see… Let me prescribe some medicine," he said, scribbling away on his notebook.

He always wrote down the names to let me know what he was feeding me. We did not ask for it, but he always did it. He wanted to make sure that we knew he was giving me the right medicine and was not harming my health in any way.

"Has it started to happen after His Highness left?" he asked.

"Yes," I nodded. "I am ashamed to be in a pathetic condition for no reason."

"It can happen," he said. "This is not normal, however, and not good as well. Your Highness, let me tell you something. You are also a very powerful person. You are a dark mage and your power is not less at all even if it is not fully awakened. Your Highness should never think you cannot live without a certain person and that you are useless without that person because you are not.

You can still live, you can still shine. Living with someone, and spending life with someone should be a matter of your decision, not an obligation. So, never think that way. It will make you feel lonely and dependent."

"I know I am strong too. I can live by myself. It's just… I feel pathetic sometimes. Whenever I take a step forward, the wind of my past pushes me backward. There are people who want to push me down, who don't want me to shine. How can I overcome all of that?"

One of the people who could boost my confidence was Doctor Dimitri. He was young, but he always seemed quite wise. He was a brilliant doctor after all; he had to be wise.

"It's not hard. Your Highness just needs to have the mentality to overcome all of this. Just don't think that you are useless without someone," he said.

I knew who that someone was. I did not have to ask and he did not tell me either. What he wanted to do was let me know that I was not useless; I could shine without anyone leading me.

I did not have enough confidence. But I tried to believe him.

"Take these medicines every night. One of each after dinner, before going to bed. Continue for seven days. If Your Highness still cannot sleep, please let me know."

"And please keep in mind what I said," he added before leaving.

I stared at the two bottles of pills, then sighed. How did I end up in such a pathetic state? Or, was I always so pathetic? Love did not make me pathetic, my life did, and my past did.

I pulled myself up and went to the washroom to freshen up. I had my dinner already. Before going to bed, I took the pills as the doctor instructed.

His words were running through my head. I was thinking about every single of his words carefully. My eyes felt heavy very quickly, putting an end to my thoughts as I drifted off to sleep quickly.

'What the hell…? Not again…!'

I was inside him again, my brother. I could see with his eyes and experience his life. He was standing in the middle of a dark room. Half of the bedsheet was falling on the floor from the bed as he sat on a side. I felt anxiety and anger. It was something he was feeling.

There were broken pieces of glass all around the room, papers were torn into uneven pieces and there was a burning smell.

The burning smell did not come from far away, but rather from the paper he was holding in his hand which was on fire.